1. It can be a balancing act to present yourself as personable while still keeping people out of your safe zone. Yet every so often we are blessed with that special someone (usually drunk) who finds it kosher to just walk up and practically crawl inside your blues with you.
2. Alright, they refused to stop for a broken tail light. Still, we feel like this guy when Sarge calls off the chase. I’m still a cop, right?
3. It’s funny how every “tough guy” turns into Connor McGregor once the cuffs go click. I’m lucky for a lot of things in my life. I’ll add your being in handcuffs so you can’t beat me up to the list, sir.
4. “How come you didn’t dust that wet rock for finger prints Officer?”
Sorry, rocks don’t have fingers. Thanks a lot CSI. Now I have to explain why we’re not as cool in real life as we are on TV.
5. It would be really nice if I could get out over radio and advise on the carjacking in progress I just happened to roll up on but the rookie wants everyone to know that there is a malnourished yellow cat with brown spots wearing what may or may not be a collar in the middle of the second most lane northbound on the highway not-at but just-before the mile marker 23. Get off the radio!
6. “You ever shot anybody?”
Nothing like asking someone if they’ve ever killed someone to break the ice. If I did, it wouldn’t exactly be my opener with a complete stranger. TMI goes both ways folks.
7. While we’re on guns…
“I get why you had to use your gun, but why didn’t you just shoot him in the leg?”
I’m pretty sure Dirty Mike and the boys aren’t just trying to take out my legs. There’s a reason we don’t wear Kevlar shin guards. Shoot to stop the threat means shoot to stop the threat and we’re all tired of explaining that
Stereotypes are ugly and offensive. No cop should have to be prejudged by the uniform they wear. Never mind. The power of the donut is undeniable.